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Archive for February, 2010

When I see Ke$ha at the top of the iTunes purchase list, I always wonder who is really buying this song. Now I know.

Keep in mind, if you laugh, you and the Prince of Darkness will be bunkmates for eternity.

I post this as a social commentary showing Youtube unites the world and gives a voice to average folk … young ladies with a dream … young ladies who prefer glitz to substance.

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The Tulsa World’s Bill Haisten spoke with new OSU offensive coordinator, who also played the janitor in “Breakfast Club, and he claimed he could install his spread offense in three days.

Geez. I thought it was really intricate. But if everything I’ve read about Mike Leach and his offense is true, you’re basically running the same five or six plays … just in different formations.

Three days? That’s how long Sting has sex. That’s how long it takes Pat Green to get home. That’s 10 days less than the Cuban missle crisis. Bravo, Coach Holgorsen.

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Granted, this is no “Boom goes the dynamite.” But any video where a reporter is flaming (pardon the pun, perhaps?) is high comedy to me.

Journalism schools teach pointless classes about passive verbs and ethics and New York Times vs. Sullivan. But they leave out the basics, i.e. don’t make effeminate hand gestures while doing sideline reporting at a basketball game, don’t look like you’re auditioning for an al Queda ransom video and don’t walk out of the shot because you hear footsteps.

I went to journalism school. And we had one honest teacher. She basically told this girl in the broadcast department she was too overweight to really be a viable job candidate. And not a few pounds. This girl was nice but ghastly. Which is fine. But aside from Shelly Smith, there are VERY few overweight female TV reporters. Just the nature of the business. You can’t be a dumbass and work at NASA, right? Is that unfair? Neither is this.

Everyone said the teacher was mean (the teacher was a female by the way, lesbian if you care). But she was right. She saved that girl years of sending off audition tapes and rushing to her email each morning hoping for a response.

The lesson? Mock crappy student reporters. But guide them another way if given a chance.

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Is this funny? Here is Tulsa’s version of Kenan Thompson doing a segment called “Mondo Tulsa” where he makes funny faces in front of Tulsa landmarks.

You know this guy is hoping Travel Channel of E! “Wild On Sexy Beaches” will come across this clip and offer him a hosting gig.

I bet Kevin Smith thinks this is hilarious.

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If anyone wants to know how to get into the NCAA Tournament, ask John Klein. He’s figured out what it will take for the Pokes to qualify.

“Wins will keep pushing up your stock with the NCAA Selection Committee, but losses can push you out the door.”

Oh snap. Other breaking news: Bears shit in the woods and Howdy Doody has wooden balls.

His opening lines for the column …

OKLAHOMA STATE once again finds itself comfortably on top of the NCAA Tournament bubble.

The Cowboys, for the second straight year, have played themselves into a good spot for an NCAA slot.

No team is “comfortably” on the buble. That is the whole nature of the bubble. You’re not comfortable because you don’t know whether you’re in or out.

Klein has been on a miserable roll with his uninspired take on the Sean Sutton debacle to when he said next year’s Super Bowl in Dallas was being played in “the neighborhood.” Yes, he meant Tulsa.

Seriously, did John Klein catch one of the Lortons standing over a dead body with a bloody knife or down at Club Majestic in a pink tutu? He HAS to have some dirt on somebody important to keep his job.

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Austin Box has to pee. So back off, coppers.

The OU linebacker got nabbed for whizzing on a barstool outside Skky Bar on Friday night. Who knew Red Bull and Vokda was a diuretic?

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I thank God I’m not addicted to anything (donkey porn and Wheat Thins, not withstanding). Sean Sutton was arrested for his elaborate schemes to buy painkillers. And while he wasn’t much of a coach and kind of a goober, you have to feel for the guy.

Fans knew about the crippling back pain from which he suffered. Then there’s the 2001 plane crash, his father’s arrest and subsequent downfall, then getting axed from his dream job; the guy has been through a lot.

My question: Why did he continue to live in Stillwater? I’m sure he had a nice home, the kids enjoyed their school, blah blah. But of course you’re going to be depressed if you live in Stillwater and AREN’T the head coach of the men’s basketball team. That’s like continuing to live down the hall from your ex-wife while she plays hide the pickle with her yoga teacher. Just saying …

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