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Archive for April, 2009

Blunt 40-Times and Chronic Drops

Blunt 40-Times and Chronic Drops

Who among us didn’t think Adarius Bowman wasn’t a first round pick after putting up 300 yards receiving against Kansas in 2006? We know the story from there: bad 40-time. Weed test positive. No draft pick. CFL.

Now Bowman is an afterthought mention in a CFL trade!

Maple Ridge native and Canadian Football League defensive back Brady Browne was traded Thursday to the Winnipeg Blue Bombers from the Saskatchewan Roughriders.

Browne was included in a package deal that saw offensive lineman Dan Goodspeed moved to Saskatchewan in exchanged for receiver Adarius Bowman and Canadian offensive lineman Jean Francois Morin-Roberge. A number of late-round and conditional draft picks were also swapped in the trade.

Last year he caught 23 passes for 358 yards and three touchdowns in the CFL. One would think he still has the talent to play in the NFL. (Maybe the Tulsa Talons? I’m sure he could sell a KIA) But its pretty sad to see a relatively nice guy (from all I’ve heard) make a few bad decisions and end up in a league that even Canadians don’t care about.

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Is there a bigger douche nozzle in Tulsa sports media that whoever is behind “The Picker” byline at the Tulsa World? This is a serious, legitimate newspaper. And they allow some cranky, virgin-y editor to pen an anonymous column that bags on everything and everyone. He always picks against local teams (ex: Syracuse would trounce OU in the NCAA Tourney) to be contrary to the paper’s fans. He’s like the guy who won’t eat at the nice Mexican restaurant and instead goes to some hole-in-the-wall to fulfill a kitch factor and ends up eating watery beans and a burrito that looks like someone took a diarrehea on top of it.

It takes huge balls to bag on local media, local fans, local players and local coaches in a major newspaper when you don’t have to be accountable for anything you write. That’s what blogs are for.

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The Tulsa World reported that Mike Gundy is the state’s second higest paid employee, second only to Bob Stoops. I think the lady with the mustache at the tag agency on 97th and Riverside is a close third.

Gundy already made $150,000 by Feb. 27. We hear he bought a Camaro, three 24K gold chains, a Scotty Cameron putter, a Chia Gundy (only available now in Taiwan) and lots of gel. LOTS of gel.

Of course, the bookworms come out when its announced a towel-snapping jock is pulling down millions.

From the World’s story:

But Andrew Zimbalist, economics professor at Smith College in Massachusetts, called the coaches’ market “artificial and trumped up.”

Zimbalist said that some collegiate coaches earn almost as much as professional coaches, even though pro teams make millions more than their collegiate counterparts.

He added that many coaches would continue to coach even if their salaries were slashed.

“The guys don’t earn salaries that are justified economically,” Zimbalist said.

Calm down, Andy. Take off your tweed jacket, stroke your beard hiding your chinless profile and enjoy a glass of warm tea. Sure, coaches would still coach if they weren’t paid that much. But they wouldn’t work 18 hour days or give a crap if they lost. And if someone is willing to pay it, they’re seeing a return on their investment. All these colleges paying multi-million dollar salaries aren’t doing so to waste money. So go edit your research piece that no one will read and wait on the next call from some intrepid reporter looking for “the other side” to a news story who naturally calls some scholar because they know they’ll be waiting by the phone penciling in their arm hairs and slapping TA’s on the buttcheeks. Male and female.

If everyone could do it, they wouldn’t pay them that much. For examples, see: Blake, John

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You're the reason God made Oklahoma ... even without a calico cat.

You're the reason God made Oklahoma ... even without a calico cat.

I heard posts about Erin Andrews leads to page views. What key words do I need? Uhhh…. Erin Andrews. Oklahoma. Erin Andrews. Tulsa. Erin Andrews was making out with John Holcomb and James Hale. Erin Andrews. Erin Andrews. Oklahoma.

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In anticipation of the AP Poll for college football next year, the big wigs in the sports blogs should mobilize and form a sports blogosphere poll and crown a national champion. Think about it. It’d be as relevant at the AP National Champion. Plus, it’d have more input from more pollsters – people who actually get to see most of these teams play. Many beat reporters are at the game of the team they cover all day and must rely on highlights to gauge who is the best.

The national championship trophy could be 6-feet tall with a sculpture of this guy, who probably is a rough composite of a large percentage of sports bloggers.

Where'd I put that zip drive? Oh yeah, under my tits.

Where'd I put that zip drive? Oh yeah, under my tits.

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Older than the Wing-T

Older than the Wing-T

This sounds like something you’d say as a joke, a hyperbolic statement that is hilarious because of its inability to be true. Former OU football broadcaster and 70-year-old deaf, mind-wandering curmudgeon John Brooks is calling the Union football games next year on KYAL The Sports Animal. HA HA HA.

What? It’s true?

From the Tulsa World:

Union broadcasts were carried for several seasons by KRMG am740, but Union rights recently were acquired by KYAL fm97.1 (the Tulsa Sports Animal). The 70-year-old Brooks will do all regular-season and postseason games for the defending Class 6A state champion Redskins. His color analyst partner will be Kevin Ward, the KYAL sports director. Longtime Union sideline reporter Doc Blevins will continue in that role.

This can only go badly. Brooks’ segments on the Animal sounds like Ross Perot’s running mate Admiral Stockdale in the 1988 vice-presidential debates.  He’s 70! He should be calling bingo games not high school football games. And for the state champs! Again, this can only go badly.

And there’s no point talking about Kevin Ward, the most vanilla Broken Arrowy middle-aged white dude in jeans and sneakers ever. His “Animal Fodder” morning talk show actually does “This day in history …” bits. Even the boys at K-Hits think that’s played.

At least former OU quarterback and KWTV sports director Dean Blevins is doing sidelines. What?… Really?…. Sorry, it’s Doc Blevins. No idea who that is.

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This is old news but it reminded me of it when I read a story about Billy Gillespie never handing out t-shirts made by Nike celebrating Jodie Meeks 54-point game this season. They just sat in his office collecting dust as Billy wiped boogers on the side of the box.

This is from some goober local Kentucky station in the midst of Gillespie’s firing. I wonder if he’s really on the phone. I don’t think so. And if he is, what’s the person on the other end think when Billy’s panting.

“Uh … you want to call me back? ”

I’m sure this reporter hides under the blanket justification that he’s “just doing his job.” But there’s a certain point where I don’t need the news. I don’t want the news. When Gillispie starts running, that’s his quote. That’s his soundbite. Anything he says after that can’t be better than him running. So why embarrass BOTH of you. Also, nice mustache.

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