OSU did it. They won. And I’ll blow Howdy Doody with sandpaper if this doesn’t feel f*cking amazing. I’m woozy with drunk victory. There was a lot of talk about seedings and match-ups and the “experts” breaking down each contest. But in the end, Pistol Pete emerged in the ESPN Radio mascot challenge as the champion … a story reported breathlessly by Bill Haisten and the Tulsa World.
After all, when you’re banished from spring practice, what else can the OSU football beat writer do than track a mascot contest? When you can’t nab those quotes of Gundy conveying disappointment in his 20-something quarterback or hear about OSU’s linebacker turning Orie Lemons into Orie Lemonade (zing!), what else can you fill the paper with? More John Klein columns filled with misplaced commas, poor metaphors and rare verb-noun agreement?
Gundy wants to shake Pistol Pete’s hand. Unironically. When Boone Pickens said all his millions would buy a championship, he wasn’t lying. Take that, HBO Sports.